Nathan Poole’s Statement for His Mother’s Funeral
(Charlotte Joanne Fore Poole)
My mom was very proud of the fact that she was from West VA. Many of you may have noticed a little twang in her voice, unless of course you were part of the West VA club at The Villages. As a child growing up, I didn't notice it until one day when she took me to the National Zoo. While looking at the Tiger exhibit I remember her getting excited and telling me to "look, look there is a TAGer!". I said what did you say and again she told me she saw a TAGer. I quickly learned that that's how she said TIGER and was indeed from West VA. We shared many laughs with one another as we discussed the latest West VA jokes we learned.
My mom loved to play games. One evening we were playing Scattegories. For those of you not familiar with the game, you roll a die to determine the letter all the words related to a series of statements must begin with. For example the statement may be "a fruit" and the letter "a" would be on the die. Some might write "Apple" in that instance. Well the letter rolled for the round we were playing was "L" and the statement was "red hot molten blank". My mom was so proud when she revealed her word. She waited patiently with a sinister proud grin and yelled "larvae" as if she got us all. Needless to say we had a good laugh over the red hot molten LARVAE.
She loved to laugh and laughed often. Even if it was at her own silliness. Through this she taught me to never take myself too seriously. To never be too proud to laugh at myself and my mistakes.
Over the years my mom never met a person she didn't know. Whether it was a former student (and she could always recall all their names, their siblings, etc...) or it was a perfect stranger she'd met in the grocery store check out line that day. She could always find a common ground and always treated people kind as she genuinely cared. I can remember her bringing her less privileged students clothes, book bags and even recently donating brand new coats to those in need. She would sometimes bring home students who came from broken homes in order for them to experience a weekend of joy and love away from the negative household they were being raised in or the foster care system they had become a part of. Over the past several days I've been amazed at how many people have sent me private messages saying "your mom was so good to me". Many of these from those same children my mom cared about and touched. A true testament to her kind heart and the goodwill she shared with so many.
From this she taught me to never place myself above my fellow man and to be caring, kind, compassionate, empathetic and charitable.
My mom and I were extremely close and had a very strong bond. I'll never forget reaching those adolescent years we all go through when your parents become an embarrassment (sorry Dad). During this time in my life I didn't want her to kiss, hug or tell me "I love you" in front of my friends. So we came up with a silent code to share with one another so that no one would know. It was a simple squeeze of the hand. Three squeezes for the three words, "I love you". We could do this anywhere and at anytime and no one would know. Later in life after getting over my adolescent embarrassment we continued to do this and I now do it with the people I love. Not out of embarrassment, but because it reminds me of my mom and the unconditional love parents give their children.
This did teach me a lesson that took growing older and more wise to learn. Never be embarrassed to tell those you love that you love them and more importantly tell those you love that you love them often.
As many of you know My mom loved to dance and her and my dad even put a dance floor in their home in VA (now an also an impromptu skating rink for my daughter). There is one thing my mom wanted so desperately to teach me. How to dance. We took lessons and the instructor finally broke the news to her. He told her your son can't dance. I mean literally he can't dance. I suppose that gene skipped a generation since her granddaughter can dance and loves to dance. Reflecting on this I now realize it wasn't so much about me dancing but was more about spending time with her doing what she loved and was so passionate about. After all, how many times did I try to turn her on to my music to only be asked "when do they stop tuning up".
My mom was delighted when she became a grandmother. Especially when she learned she now had a granddaughter. Having raised two boys, she never got to dote over a little girl. Well I can tell you that my daughter, Alma, was the joy of her life and she dotted over her like no other. She finally had her little princess to buy cute outfits for and buy she did. Alma loved the gifts, but most of all just loved spending time with her grandmother, or mee-maw, as my daughter affectionately called her. She was a proud grandmother and loved to surprise Alma by picking her up at school, by taking her on little outings or simply taking her to the park. She just loved spending time with her family.
From this she taught me it isn't about how much you spoil your children, but it's about the amount of quality time you spend with your children creating memories to last a lifetime. One of my favorite quality time memories is when I must have been six and she helped me sew the "S" on what was to be my superman cape. Its those moments that I treasure the most. Not the moments of receiving material gifts, but the moments of spending quality time with my Mom.
She also taught me to try new things and to not be afraid of failure. To go after what you want and enjoy what you do. For years she'd always joke at family gatherings that she got my favorite pie. Pumpkin pie, which I despised, but eventually I tried and can now say that I love pumpkin pie. Just a very small example of her persistent nature. Eventually I came around and she wasn't going to give up until I did. Funny how moms are always right. Even in her final days she remained persistent and made friends with a very kind nurse at the hospital. This nurse even stopped by on her day off to be with my mother. Ironically my mom was working her magic as she tried to play match maker with her. And who knows it may have just paid off. More will be revealed in time.
Alma is not here, but was very sad to learn of her grandmother passing. When I told her she cried and after a little while began to recall all the fun they had together and reminded me that my mom is in heaven having a great time making new friends, dancing and running into old friends and family that have gone before her. Through the mouths of babes we can learn some of the most important lessons and she has taught me to let go and remember all the good times for my mom is in a better place.
There were many a good times and my mom was always there for us. Good times and bad times; she always knew what to say and how to comfort us. Something I will miss, but I recognize she will always be with us, watching over us and helping to ensure we always do the next right thing. Even in her passing she said to me you can go now and I'll see you up there (as she pointed to the sky). She knew where she was headed and knew I'd see her again.
A truly remarkable woman who didn't put up airs of pretentiousness and lived life to the fullest always putting others first. I'm proud to say she is my mom and my daughters grandmother. She will be missed but never forgotten.